Gratitude Shift
By Paul Bauer on Jun 13, 2018 in Creativity & Innovation, The "Not Enough Effect"
“The struggle ends when the gratitude begins.”
– Neale Donald Walsch
Have you ever had an instance in your life where you didn’t get what
you wanted or hoped for? In other words, when things didn’t go your way?
It happens to the best of us, but the key is what do you when you don’t get what you want and more importantly, what do you tell yourself when it eventually happens?
Let’s say there are two basic options of what you do when things don’t go your way:
Option 1
Do you say, “Ok, that didn’t work out, I’ll just do it differently”
and move on?
Option 2
Or, do you get disappointed and allow circumstances to dictate how you feel?
For many years, I unconsciously chose the second option (disappointment)
and frankly that choice drove me nuts! At first, didn’t notice the choice
I had made (because it was an un-conscious decision). But the more it
happened, the more it got my attention. I recalled that any feeling,
good or bad, is a message from your subconscious. And the way I felt
was clearly not happy, because I felt dissatisfied.
The more it happened, the more it spoke to me and the more it woke me up.
Webster defines disappointment as:
Unhappiness from the failure of something hoped for
or expected to happen.
Hmm, I noticed several things about that definition.
* A state of unhappiness
* The feeling of failure
* Something expected or hoped for
That’s a LOT packed into one simple definition, yet this little word
often becomes the very thing that takes the wind out of our sails
and changes our mood (in a matter of seconds).
Often what happens when we want something, we set up an expectation and
we un-consciously get attached to that thing we expect. It’s like we place all our hopes and energy into it, and when it doesn’t show up in the very way we what, our feelings get hurt and we do our own version of “pouting”.
Disappointment = Lack of Gratitude
In essence, when we feel disappointed, we’ve shifted our vibration
dramatically lower than we can imagine.
Disappointment of not getting what you want = LOC 125 (on Hawkins Map of Consciousness.) For reference, Courage is LOC 200 and Peace is LOC 600.
The Problem with Lack of Gratitude
When you want more or when you are disappointed, you’re sending a
signal to the Universe that you are ungrateful. That lack of gratitude
“short circuits” your manifesting power because it acts as a limiter
and compresses your natural vibration.
“Gratitude also opens your eyes to the limitless potential of the
universe, while dissatisfaction closes your eyes to it.” – Anon
Disappointment and dissatisfaction are indicators of our lack of gratitude.
And when you are disappointed that something has not gone your way,
the signal you’re sending is one of scarcity.
The Antidote for Disappointment and Dissatisfaction
If you ever feel like things aren’t going your way, and you need a shot
of enthusiasm, this article may be the very thing you’ve been looking
for to make your own “Gratitude Shift” to transform your life.
(Read on for a cool exercise you can use).
“Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine
jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings.”
– William Arthur Ward
The Real Shift Comes From Your Heart
Let’s say you’re having a bad day and you’ve begin to notice that you
haven’t been feeling much gratitude. And you remember that “gratitude is
the antidote” and you decide to “turn on the gratitude”.
Here’s where it can get kind of complicated.
If you choose to be grateful because by being grateful you think it
will get you what you want, then the signal you’re actually sending is:
1) You don’t have what you want
2) You’re not truly grateful (you’re in your ego)
This kind of gratitude isn’t real – it has no real feeling. It comes
from the mind. The mind thinks it can win if it “does something”
(rather than feeling it and being it through your Heart).
And the intent is you send the feeling of “not having” into
your gratitude and splits it into two – having and not having.
In other words, it’s like “faking it till you make it” – a common
slogan from the motivational movement that relies primarily
on the ego mind to get ahead and “go for the gusto”.
Gratitude Shift occurs when you choose to step back and let go
and allow your Heart to be your guide. It is the part of you that
allows you to feel gratitude (and does the actual creating!)
“Gratitude is the key that unlocks the essence of
your Heart and all of life”. – Dr. Joseph Dremer
So, how do you shift into gratitude? The kind of gratitude that lasts
more than just a couple of minutes? The kind of gratitude that makes
you feel good just by feeling it?
Imagine this exercise helping you make the very shift that
opens the flow (and gives you peace of mind that lasts)
“Gratitude Shift” Exercise
1. Close your eyes
2. Begin to breathe slowly and deeply
3. Touch your Heart and begin to get in touch with how you’re feeling
4. Think of something you love, something you already have in your life
that you really appreciate (a friend, a pet, a loved one, a work of art)
5. Allow yourself to really feel that feeling of gratitude – from your Heart and just breathe into that feeling for at least several minutes.
Practice this exercise when you’ve got some time to appreciate it (like in the morning before you jump into the busy-ness of the day or right before bed).
And let yourself feel the essence of gratitude as it reminds you of your Essence…
And so it is…
“If the only prayer you ever prayed was thank you,
that would be enough” – Meister Eckart
Would love your comments below!
14 Comment(s)
By Jennifer on Jun 15, 2018 | Reply
Just loved this article Paul. I was just feeling that kind of disappointment set in and then your message showed up! The perfect remedy for me today! Thank you and blessings. Jen
By Marcy on Jun 15, 2018 | Reply
Just loved this post! I felt the shift when I did the process you shared. I’m going to share this with my family and friends. My humble gratitude to you Paul!
By Bonnie on Jun 15, 2018 | Reply
I know this feeling, frustration etc and gratefulness does help. We forget that the heart knows what the mind can’t remember.
By Marlo on Jun 15, 2018 | Reply
Thank you for again laying out this wisdom in a clear, relatable format. Your messages Paul make such a positive impact. Thank you! When I closed my eyes to think of something I already have in my life that I appreciate, the positive thoughts came pouring in. So refreshing, so beautiful. I am grateful for you Paul and the truths you share.
Blessings to all.
By Paul Bauer on Jun 15, 2018 | Reply
@Jennifer – Hi Jen, Glad you enjoyed the article. Sounds like you you put the process into action and felt the difference! Way to go! Aloha, Paul
By Paul Bauer on Jun 15, 2018 | Reply
@Marlo – Aloha Marlo. Thank you for sharing your experience! Did you feel the feeling in your Heart?
By Sussi on Jun 15, 2018 | Reply
Terrific technique, I’ll guide my grand kids through it so they can stop the pain of disappointment. With a little talk about how we attract what we feel and focus on, and gratitude attracts more to be grateful for!!
By Will Ambrose on Jun 16, 2018 | Reply
Paul, just a few minutes ago I experienced an upset which I responded to in a controlling manner. Then I found your article in my email and practiced the heart-gratitude exercise. Now I am serene and my mind is filled with praise for wonderful friends.
Thank you for your gift
By Korina on Jun 16, 2018 | Reply
What a great article, Paul, thank you. I especially loved the reminder of where the feeling of disappointment ranks in the frequency scale. Wow. That right there was enough to make me shift out of disappointment over a situation that I habe been carrying around for over a year. Thank you again.
By Penny on Jun 17, 2018 | Reply
Paul – Were you able to be grateful all through grief? You must still be grieving? My husband was diagnosed with multiple myeloma 10/10/17 and he passed away 12/17/17. Most of that time he was in terrible pain — and then he was gone! Before he died, I had a healthy, hopeful spiritual life in which gratitude came easily. But now, when I try to find gratitude for the 42 years we had together, it just dissolves into complete sadness, overwhelm and frustration at losing him.
By Paul Bauer on Jun 19, 2018 | Reply
@Penny – Hi Penny. I’m sorry to hear about your husbands passing. Each of us process grief in different ways. Take all the time you need and be gentle with yourself.
As to your question “Were you able to be grateful all through grief?”
Fore me In essence, yes. But the gratitude did NOT come from my mind. I kept my Heart open and allowed the sadness to empty out and I consciously chose to let the Light in. I had a series of amazing friends and therapists who helped me through what would have otherwise been some very dark nights.
But, the day Susan passed, something in me got very clear. I had clear intent about moving forward in my life. In my relationship, in my career and life itself. That clarity has paid dividends beyond what I could have imagined.
By the way, We never “lose” anyone. They just shifted their energy. From form to formless. The people we love will always be in our Hearts. It’s up to us to let them go and move forward with our Soul’s destiny. Remember, the Soul never dies, it just changes form.
Blessings,
Paul
By Bobbye Middendorf on Jun 19, 2018 | Reply
Dear Paul,
Thank you for the insights reminding me of the potency of heart-full gratitude. What a difference it makes.
I wanted to underscore and amplify the “reasons” that your exercise works so powerfully. By focusing from the heart on how you feel in the presence of a beloved pet or the awe you feel sitting outside under a canopy of stars, or looking into the eyes of a Beloved … All of those practices engage the hormones of nurturance (vs. the ones we usually feel courtesy of the “stress” hormones.)
So in essence, your beautiful exercise (#PracticeYourPractices) creates in-the-body physiological shifts into an upward spiral of self-nurturing. This is, in essence, the experiential embodiment of gratitude.
With love and appreciation for you!
By Bobbye Middendorf on Jun 19, 2018 | Reply
It was great to read this reminder, which is almost like one of my mantras:
“If the only prayer you ever prayed was thank you,
that would be enough” – Meister Eckart
By Thelma on Jun 26, 2018 | Reply
Hi Paul, thank you so much for the Gratitude Shift email. . . This is the best email I ever received a good advise for struggles in life! God bless!
Thelma